Because I’m Awesome

Among the crap that the wind will toss your way while you’re scooting along the long(not so long) road known as life are weddings.

Ever notice how profoundly different women react to marriage news from men?

Women
Barbie: I’m getting married!
Wonder Woman: OH MY GOD!!!!! He proposed??? When!!! Where!!! What???? HOW???
Katherine Heigl: Can I be one of your bridesmaid?
Barbie: It was wonderful. He got down on his knees AND OMG THE RING!!! DID I MENTION THE RING!!??11
Wonder Woman: So have you picked out the dress? Oh this is going to be so wonderful!
Katherine Heigl: So can I be one of your bridesmaid?

Men
Ken: I’m getting married boys.
Persian Messenger: This is madness!
Snoop Dogg: Fo shizzle? Abortion?
Ken: She’s not pregnant.
Persian Messenger: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
Goddam Batman: I’m the goddamn Batman.

You see my point.

Truth is. In that similar scenario, and in that similar conversation, Ken will always be the only man among the boys. The man that is willing to forgo everything that is fun(being a boy) to take on the suck(being a man). The rest of the boys know that too. But reacting otherwise would make them appear totally gay.

Unless you’re the goddam Batman.

Hello kids.

In my futile attempt to salvage what is left of the decaying piece of foreskin on the very shaft of what used to be her majesty’s english, I shall begin writing again.

This is the one where it begins.